I just had a moment of cultural clarity the other day.
While trying on some new pants that my ex-girlfriend had bought me, I tucked my shirt in to see what it would look like. Normally unless someone demands that I tuck it in, I never tuck my shirt it. When I was modelling it, my ex remarked, "how whoa, nice pants. Now you look Chamorro."
Guana? Hu hasso na'ya put i sinangan-na. Kao magahet este? Pues hu hasso put fihu i trihin i Chamorro lahi, ya hu realisa na magahet, hunggan! Sesso ma tuck in i franelan-niha.
So, sporting my new "Chamorro" look I realized one of the many reasons why Chamorro girls never hit on me. I don't do tucked it, which means I'm hip hop, but then I don't dress hip hop and I don't act hip hop, so therefore, this combined with my painted clothes, that fact that I speak Chamorro and speak English weird means that I slip through all sorts of categories of attraction.
Will this epiphany lead me to para mo'na tuck in my shirt? I doubt it.