Sakigake Chamorro #4: Gantz

With some of the stress of the writing and defending a dissertation over now, I can finally enjoy the breaths that I take and try to relax a little bit. As some might be familiar with on this blog, one of the ways that I relax is by writing songs or poems in Chamorro, or translating lyrics from songs into Chamorro.

The past month while I’ve been furiously writing my dissertation was the longest period of time since 2000 that I went without opening up my Chamorro dictionary. As I’ve been shut away in my computer for so long, and without doing much talking, thinking or writing in Chamorro, I’ve actually felt at times the language fading from my head. That’s why it was exciting recently, after defending my dissertation, to finally open up the dictionary again and start work on translating another song.

This post is the fourth installment of a feature that I call Sakigakke Chamorro! In this feature I take a song from a Japanese anime and translate it into Chamorro. The translation is never meant to be a literal or a direct one, but one which is more interested in exploring potential imagery in the Chamorro language and imaginary. In many anime songs, the lyrics aren’t meant to be serious, but are instead playful in a paradoxically deep poppy sense. They collapse words or images together in creative and sometimes apparently random ways, in order to make catchy or intriguing lyrics. In my translations I attempt similar things.

The first anime that I translated a song from was Sakigakke! Cromartie High School, hence the name of the feature “Sakigakke.” The second was from FLCL, while the third was the song “Blue Bird” from the anime Naruto Shippudden.



For this installment, I’ve chosen the song “Last Kiss” by Bonnie Pink from the anime Gantz. I began reading the manga a few months back and got hooked on it. (Gof paire este na kamek). I haven’t watched any of the anime yet, but I came across the Youtube video and lyrics for the song while I was searching for more info on the manga. Otro fino'-ta, bei hu tuge' mas put Gantz gi otro biahi, sa' ayu yan Berserk i mas ya-hu na mangan pa'go. Yaya-hu ha' Naruto, lao mas para famagu'on Naruto, yan este otro na dos para i manggaiidat.

As usual, here’s the lyrics in Japanese to get us started.

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Akaku moeru kokoro kotoba ubaware sansetto
Tatazunda jikan to omoi no fukasa wa ikooru
Tatta hitokoto de tabidatsu no?
Kare no inai ashita wa
It's bitter like beer for kids

Yaseta yubi ni kisu wo shita
Anata wo zutto wasurenai yo
Tatoe hanarebanare demo
Saigo no kisu wo oboete iru yo oboete iru yo

Hajimari wa dare demo junshinmuku na beibii
Nigai mi kajittemo kujikecha dame yo walk straight
Satta koto dakedo ame no naka zukizuki itamu yo
I'm lonely as floating ice

Yaseta yubi ni kisu wo shita ano nukumori wo wasurenai yo
Tatoe hanarebanare demo anata no kisu wo oboete iru yo

Doushitemo wakariaenu nara mitodokeru yo kawa no you ni
Dare wo nani wo semetemo ii ai shita koto dake wa kegasanaide

Yaseta yubi ni kisu wo shita
Anata wo zutto wasurenai yo
Itsuka aeru to shinjite saigo no kisu wo kamishimeru yo
Yaseta yubi ni kisu wo shite naita anata wo omoidasu yo
Kore de owari da to shitemo
Saigo no kisu wa wasurenai yo wasurenai yo

Kare no kisu wo wasurenai yo wasurenai yo

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Since I don’t speak or understand Japanese, I have to rely on the random translations of these songs on the internet. From other J-pop Bonnie Pink songs I’ve heard, she often mixes in a little bit of English with her songs, making them interesting in making Chamorro translations, because there’s always an important decision about whether or not to maintain that creative dynamic, and to mix together some English and Chamorro instead of Japanese and English.

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My heart is burning red hot, the sunset has taken away my words
Time is standing still, equal to the depth of my love
Are you leaving with just one word?
Tomorrow without you
It's bitter like beer for kids

You kissed my slim fingers
I’ll never forget you
Even if we’re apart
I’ll always remember, remember our last kiss

Everyone begins as an innocent, pure baby
Even if you bite into a bitter fruit, you can’t give up, walk straight
The rain has passed, but it’s still stinging me
I'm lonely as floating ice

You kissed my slim fingers, I won’t forget the warmth
Even if we’re apart, I’ll remember your kiss

You’ll eventually make sense of what you can’t understand at all, like a river
You can blame anyone, for whatever you want, but don’t dirty our love

You kissed my slim fingers
I’ll never forget you
I’ll kiss you for the last time, I believe that we’ll meet again
I remember how you cried as you kissed my slim fingers
Even if this is the end
I won’t forget, won’t forget, our last kiss

I won’t forget, won’t forget, his kiss

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I should note now (as I often do) that my translations of these songs aren’t really translations. They take some of the tone, the imagery, the words, or the spirit of the song, but I also have no problem simply coming up with my own variations when it suits me. When I put the English retranslation of the Chamorro translation below you’ll see. I do these sorts of exercises in order to help myself practice, to keep my brain soft and spongy as my grandmother sometimes says. I don’t do it to show how awesome I am at duplicating the spirit word for word, or copying the soul of Bonnie Pink.

A lot of what choices I make for words and images are chosen simply because I think the words are cool, and I’d like to find a way to use them (especially when I don’t get to normally use them in everyday conversations). Or there are images or metaphors that I’ve never imagined could be crafted in the Chamorro language, and so I’d like to see if I can pull it off.

One of my favorite words that I enjoy using in songs, but hardly get to use in real life is kifan, which means in one sense to make something worse or to aggravate it, and in another sense means to have a broken or dislocated jaw. One word which I always feel is very poetic in Chamorro and try to find ways to use is kilili. Kilili means to have something be carried away, or have it draft away by a current. I first used it in a song that I wrote several years ago called “Mattochihu” which means to have one’s limit reached in Chamorro.

In one chorus of that song I wrote the following:

Taifinakpo’ I tasi, enkubukao-hu taiguihi,
(The sea is without end, my confusion is like that)
Sesso un na’kilili, guaha na biahi nai un goggue yu’
(Sometimes you make me drift away, sometimes you save me)

Incidentally, the word kilili is also a family name in Saipan and the current non-voting delegate from there is known as Gregorio “Kilili” Camacho Sablan.

Sin mas kuentos, or without further complication or explanation, here's my version of "Last Kiss" by Bonnie Pink.

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Uttimo na Chiniku

I korason-hu gumafi, sinakke’ ni’ i tininok atdao-mu
(My heart become fire, stolen by your sunset)
Chumilong i hinasso-ku yan i minaleffå-mu
(What I remember and what you forget are the same/equal)
Kao enao ha’ i sinangån-mu
(Is that all you have to say?)
I agupa’-ku sin Hågu
(A tomorrow without you)
Maolekña binenu sin binu
(Better to have poison without the wine)

Un chiku i kalulot-hu
(You kissed my fingers)
Ti para bai hu maleffa hao
(I won’t forget you)
Achokka’ umafa’sahnge
(Even when we are separated)
Para ta hasso este, hasso este chiniku
(Will remember this, remember this kiss)

Gi kada tinituhon-ta, todu taiisao yan tailachi
(In each of our beginnings, we are all without sin and without mistakes)
Achokka’ i sakkån-mu siha sen mala’et, na’tunas hao mo’na
(Although your years are so bitter, keep moving ahead)
I ichan muna’kifan i minaleffå-ku siha
(The rain is what worsens my forgetfullness)
Mahalang yu’ kalang un islan sin tåsi
(I miss you like an island without the sea)

Un chiku este na agaga’-hu, hina’me i ante-hu
(You kiss this neck of mine, and my soul wilts at the warmth)
Achokka’ umafa’sahnge,
(Even if we are separated)
Bai hu hahasso ha’ i chiniku
(I will still remember the kiss)

Yanggen ti siña umakomprende, pues bai hu na’kilili hao esta ki i machom saddok
(If we can’t understand each other, I will let you flow until the end of the river)
Sukne maseha hafa na birak para i piniti, lao i guinaiya cha’mu yumuyute’
(Blame whatever demon for the pain, but don’t throw away love)

Un chiku este na labios-hu, ti bai hu maleffa hao
(You kissed these lips of mine, I won’t forget you)
Hu hohongge na para ta asodda’ ta’lo,
( I believe that we will meet again)
ya hu go’go’te i chikinu para ayu na ha’åni.
(And I am holding this kiss for that day)

Achokka’ este i finakpo’-ta, ti u mafñas i uttimo na chiku-ta.
(Although this is our end, this last kiss will not fade)
Ti para un maleffa
(You won’t forget)
Ti siña maleffa
(It can’t be forgotten)

Ti bai hu maleffa i chiniku
(I won’t forget the kiss)

Preparing to Reclaim Guahan

Some pictures of the preparations for the May 23rd, Reclaim Guahan Rally which took place at Skinner's Plaza in Hagatna. Tomorrow I'll post some pictures of the rally itself, it was quite an event. Despensa na gof atrasao yu' gi este.

Palin Resigns

Ilek-ña Si David Letterman: “President Obama is in Russia, and we know this because Sarah Palin can see him from her house.”

Ma anounsia gi i ma’pos na simåna, na para u tunok Si Palin ginnen i Ofisinan Gubetnon Alaska, achokka’ guaha noskuantos na sakkan tetehnan esta ki makpo’ iyo-ña term.

Meggai mandiskukuti gi este na simåna “sa’ hafa?” Kao esta para u ma pongle gi kalabosu? Kao ha cho’cho’gue este para u riku? Kao esta ha na’lilisto maisa gui’ para u falågu para i Ofisinan Presidente gi 2012? Kao ha cho’cho’gue este para i familia-ña?

Hekkua’, lao siguru yu’ na ti para u mafñas Si Palin. Teneki esta i tiguang-ta siha, ma planeneha na para u paseha gi todu i states gi lagu, kosåki siña matungo’ gui’ mas ya siña ha tungo’ mas put todu i rinkon Amerika.

Gof na’chalek na taotao Si Palin, ya gof impottante i pachot-ña para diferentes na klasin taotao Amerika siha. Para i mangconservatives, ya-ñiha gui’ sa’ i kuentos-ña kalang le’yok pat fino’ tåtte (hekkua’ hafa otro na palabra gi fino’ Chamoru maolek para “folksy pat country.”). Pues Si Palin kalang i magåhet na Amerikånu. Si ha kuentusisiyi i manmaeskuela pat i ti manapa’ka, ha kuentutusi yan ha kuentusisiyi i manmagåhet na Amerikånu siha, Para i manliberals ya-ñiha gui’ sa’ Guiya yan i otro na Republicans put hemplo Si Gingrich pat Si Rush Limbaugh, ma pipipet i inetnon Republican hatagapa’ (further right). Ya para i mandemocrats, sen maolek ha’ este.

Put fin guaha i mangcomedians, ya siempre Siha mas gumaiya Si Palin, sa’ kulang machuchuda’ gui’ todu tiempo ni’ essitan pat na’chalek na sinangan. Yanggen tumunok Si Palin ya para mo’an ti mali’li’e’ gui’, siempre Si Jon Stewart, Si Bill Maher yan Si David Letterman i manmas tumatånges.

On the Eve of the Ashes

I successfully defended my dissertation last month and even walked in my graduation ceremony a few weeks ago. But despite both of these dongkalu na gestures of closure to my life as a student, I still have at least one hurdle left before I can say that I've truly moved on and that hokkok umestudiante-ku.

I've got some revisions to work on for my dissertation, they aren't alot, but I do have a few mental blocks that are keeping me from completing them. To sum up a much longer and more interesting story, my dissertation is, to put it kindly, unconventional, and so I have to go through a number of different steps in order to explain why this unconventional approach is both useful and necessary. So for instance, the usual way that you would talk about sovereignty, is to provide a history of the topic, and name a few famous theorists or scholars whose theories or versions of sovereignty you'll be using over the course of your dissertation. I don't do this, and I have my reasons for it, and they are good reasons. Instead of treating sovereignty like a delicate intellectual object, which has to be carefully positioned in my dissertation or else risk it being cracked or scuffed, I often intentionally ignore its glorious past and illustrious present as a concept, in the hopes of depriving it of the authority and legitimacy that those sorts of grounding of a concept implicitly provide. Dissertation's are all about blandly acceding your ideas to the dominance of existing disciplinary norms and conventions, making appear to be big and important, what by the structure of the process has to in truth be a very small and minute intervention. The work that has to go into grounding yourself properly helps to create this limitation, this intrinsically conservative aspect. Its not necessary bad, it makes your work easier to understand and most likely makes it easier for people to hire you into departments.

It is much easier to just go along with this, but for those who don't you have to jump through alot of hoops, address and answers alot of questions you wouldn't have to otherwise.

Desganao yu’ put este, na guaguaha na debi di bai hu tuge’. Eståba dumiseha yu’ mohon na siña hu na’kabåles este antes di bai hu bira tåtte para Guahan. Lao mafak ayu na guinife, ti mumagåhet.

Tåya’ tiempo para bai hu gosa i hekkok na sumotteru-ku. Gigon munhåyan i “reivisons” para iyo-ku dissertation, para bai hu tutuhon fuma’na’na’gue giya i Unibetsedåt Guahan. Lastima este na summer.

I wish things were otherwise, and not just because I would like to relax while I'm Guam for a bit, and take some time off before I jump into job searching and my life as an activist/artist/grandson on Guam. This has been an exciting summer for cricket thus far, with the ICC 20/20 Championship just finished up a few weeks ago with Pakistan as the winners, and the Indian Primere League, taking place a few weeks before that. I haven't been able to enjoy the summer of cricket as much as I would like to because I've been so stuck in my dissertation, writing it, defending it and now revising it.

Tomorrow the last big cricket event of the summer will start, the infamous Ashes series between England and Australia. Over the next four months, these two teams will play 5 Tests, 2 Twenty20 Internationals and 7 One-Day Internationals. The Ashes is the most anticipated rivalry in international cricket, which dates back more than 120 years. For those of you who don't know what The Ashes is (yan siempre bula' sa' ti meggai na Chamorro tumungo' put este na huego), I'll leave it to i gef fayi na Wikipedia in order to inform you:

The Ashes is a Test cricket series, played between England and Australia. It is one of international cricket's most celebrated rivalries and dates back to 1882. It is currently played biennially, alternately in England and Australia. However, since cricket is a summer game, the venues being in opposite hemispheres means the break between series alternates between 18 and 30 months. A series of "The Ashes" now comprises five Test matches, two innings per match, under the regular rules for international Test-match cricket. If a series is drawn then the country already holding the Ashes retains them.

The series is named after a satirical obituary published in an English newspaper, The Sporting Times, in 1882 after the match at The Oval in which Australia beat England on an English ground for the first time. The obituary stated that English cricket had died, and the body will be cremated and the ashes taken to Australia. The English media then dubbed the next English tour to Australia (1882–83) as the quest to regain The Ashes.

I don't care much for either of these teams, the Australian team is one of the whitest in the world, and the English team has a few interesting players but isn't a very exciting team (at least to me). I find other matchups far more compelling, although they don't have the same claim to having a long illustrious history. The Gavaskar-Border trophy competition between India and Australia has been awesome over the past few years. I got to "watch" the commentary from last year's Test tournament in which India was able to beat Australia, in India 2-0 (out of 4). I'm really looking forward to the next one, although its unsure whether one of my favorite players Sachin Tendulkar will still be playing. I'm hoping that someday soon, when I have a job, I'll be able to find a way to watch international cricket matches while I'm on Guam, but until then, reading long with the match commentary and ball by ball highlights is all I've got.

I hope that a regular tourney between two of the less traditional teams starts up, and becomes epic in a similar fashion. Buente sina ma tutuhun i "Wasim Akram yan Anil Kumble Trophy" gi entre i intenon Pakistan yan i inetnon India. Siempre maolekna yanggen mumumu este dos na nasion gi i plasan Cricket, en lugat di i gi i aire pat i tano' Asia ni' pakin Nuclear.

Apathy is Easy

Earlier this year a group of UOG students started a group called Apathy is Easy.



They have a blog titled Do You Care and right now they are looking for submissions. Here's an excerpt the post seeking submissions:

For those who have been keeping up with this blog and our budding group "Apathy Is Easy", let us all Thank you for the support and participation. Now, onto business. Our purpose is to provide a forum, a forum for those who have no voice, for those who cower in the shadows as their purpose and intent become blurred. We challenge you, all, the world to show these issues that there are people in the world that care enough about them to defend them. We give a place for these issues to be expressed, to be free of judgment and harsh criticism. So, what are you waiting for? Write, Recite, Draw, Paint, Sketch, Produce a video, Make music, anything that shows YOU out there, CARE. We are asking for submissions, submissions that demonstrate that you actually care about something outside of yourself. For all submissions, please email us at apathyiseasy@gmail.com. So, DO IT! Spread the word, WE NEED SUBMISSIONS! Tell a friend, go on Myspace or Facebook, put your friend's list to use.

Last week I decided to submit a piece to them, to help get their blog started. I decided to write about why political apathy on Guam might be so easy, and gave two basic points from which we could seek solutions. I'm posting the piece below.

If you have anything you'd like to submit as well, please check out their blog or email them at apathyiseasy@gmail.com.

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WHY IS APATHY SO EASY?

Any answer to this question has to ask also, what context are we speaking about?

Human life is so complex and there are answers to this question, but in order to get to a useful or a productive answer, one in which you can build off of, you need to consider what context you are asking about. In what way are people apathetic? Do we mean culturally? Politically? Socially? Economically? Emotionally? There is no general way to answer all of these questions at once, so its important to establish the framework first.

So for instance, when I think about Guam and apathy, the most important form of apathy that needs to be address is the political kind. And when I say political I don't just mean "voting" in fact the thinking that politics or political activity or participation boils down to just voting is part of the problem, part of makes Guam a politically apathetic place.

In answering the question of why political apathy is easy on Guam, as I see it, there are two answers, or parts from which to start explaining the problem, and seeking solutions for it.

1. Democracy is a concept in which we envision things such as equality, participation, everyone working together, and everyone having a say in what goes on. Democracy is a wonderful thing, but in most countries today (or colonies) we don't have democracies, we have in the most basic sense, representative democracies. In a representative democracy, the governance of a community is not up to everyone in that community, a small, usually rich, educated or elite group of people is selected at regular intervals in order to govern that community. The official democratic aspect comes in when people get to elect those leaders.

Compared to the potential participation in the governing and running of a community that the term "democracy" might represent, this is a very limited and lazy role. When the official obligation of a community to the governance of their island, the only formal role that is given them is to vote everyone once in a while, you don't have much a democracy, and you have a situation which breeds apathy.

The truth about democracy is that it is hard, it requires education, work, paying attention, and so most people don't an actual democracy, don't want to actually participate in taking care of their community, they would rather someone else do it. The dual bonus of this arrangement is that: First: Thank Goodness none of us have to do it. Second: If something gets screwed up, we can always blame the government and not ourselves.

As Guam is a representative democracy, this is one reason why we are a politically apathetic community. Guam has high turn-out numbers for elections (although this is declining slowly), but beyond this where is the commitment to the community? We may hear about it in small ways, after typhoons, when a family member is in need, but what does it mean if we are only an active community in case of emergency? Where does that leave us in terms of day-to-day running of the island?

2. When anthropologist Catherine Lutz visited Guam in April she gave several talks about her research on the effects of militarization on civilian communities. She gave a UOG Presidential lecture, she spoke to activist organizations and even the Guam Legislature. I had the chance to hear several of her talks and one of the her many findings about potential negative impacts that a community like Guam may experience after a massive military influx, is that it may become more politically apathetic.

Much of Lutz's research came from the time she spent conducting research at Fort Bragg in North Carolina and the communities surrounding the base. She said that the interest and motivation for local community governance declined. Voting rates dropped as military presence increased, and local communities tended to stop looking for economic development opportunities and instead chose to rely on military money.

Strong military presence can also lead to the civilian acceptance of military values, and this is something we can see very present in Guam. People will be more predisposed to accepting what their leaders say, less willing to question them or to stand up for themselves. All in all, communities become less sustainable, less willing and able to make decisions for themselves, since they see that responsibility as laying with the military, or with Washington D.C. This acceptance is just another form of apathy, another way in which we as a community take away our own agency, we dis-empower ourselves.

These are just two basic points, amongst many. But the next question is, if these two points are two principles sources of making Guam politically apathetic, what can you do to counter them? If both of these points help make apathy so easy for Guam, how can we make it less easy? How could you make apathy difficult?

Or, if you don't accept my arguments, and feel I am wrong, what explanations can you offer? I'd be interested to know anyone's response to this post, because these are issues that affect everyone on Guam.

Si Yu’us Ma’åse para i manhoben ni’ fuma’tinas este na lugat gi i internet. Hu diseseha mohon na para en konsigi mo’na gi este na cho’cho’, sa’ gof impottånte para i islå-ta. I meggaiña na taotao giya Guahån, ma sasångan para todu kosas (asunto) na maolekña yan mas kapås i Amerikånu siha, maolekña na siha muma’gåsi hit. Ti mananggokuyon hit guini gi este na isla.

Este na hinasso un otro na klasin “apathy” ya hu diseseha na siña un ayuda yu’ gi muna’susuha este na sinieñte ginnen i taotao-ta yan i islå-ta.

Two Independence Day Messages

The first comes from President Barack Obama. Teneki ilelek-ña bula put taimanu debi di ta fatta este na espiritun Amerikånu. Debi di ta silebra este na uniku na espiritu, ginnen i manaåpa'ka na manmofo'na Amerikånu. Siempre para fañångan put i manmumu na sindålu siha, ya debi di ta hassuyi siha yan i che’chon-ñiha.

Este na katta, dipotsi put “manhahasso.” Si Obama ha sohsohyo’ hit na para ta gof hasso på’go put hafa impottånte, hafa gaibali.

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Michael --

This weekend, our family will join millions of others in celebrating America. We will enjoy the glow of fireworks, the taste of barbeque, and the company of good friends. As we all celebrate this weekend, let's also remember the remarkable story that led to this day.

Two hundred and thirty-three years ago, our nation was born when a courageous group of patriots pledged their lives, fortunes, and sacred honor to the proposition that all of us were created equal.

Our country began as a unique experiment in liberty -- a bold, evolving quest to achieve a more perfect union. And in every generation, another courageous group of patriots has taken us one step closer to fully realizing the dream our founders enshrined on that great day.

Today, all Americans have a hard-fought birthright to a freedom which enables each of us, no matter our views or background, to help set our nation's course. America's greatness has always depended on her citizens embracing that freedom -- and fulfilling the duty that comes with it.

As free people, we must each take the challenges and opportunities that face this nation as our own. As long as some Americans still must struggle, none of us can be fully content. And as America comes ever closer to achieving the perfect Union our founders dreamed, that triumph -- that pride -- belongs to all of us.

So today is a day to reflect on our independence, and the sacrifice of our troops standing in harm's way to preserve and protect it. It is a day to celebrate all that America is. And today is a time to aspire toward all we can still become.

With very best wishes,

President Barack Obama

July 4th, 2009

P.S. -- Our nation's birthday is also an ideal time to consider serving in your local community. You can find many great ideas for service opportunities near you at http://www.serve.gov.

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The second is from a diary on The Daily Kos blog, published three years ago by hopeforguahan. Gi este na mina’dos na katta, parehu na mensåhi, sa’ este lokkue’ put “manhahasso.” Lao este na katta ha kombibida na i taotao Amerikånu siha para u hassuyi hafa ti ya-ñiha, hafa ga’o’-ñiha na ti mana’annok. Hafa gi i hinasson-ñiha na maolekña na maleffa pat ti matungo’.

Hafa este na “sekretu” na tiningo’, na debi di ta hassuyi lokkue’ gi este na “Ha’ånin Indpendence?” Taitai mas ya para en tingo’.

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I have often wondered whether Americans understand what they celebrate every year on July 4th “Independence Day.” Perhaps some Americans consider this day as nothing more than a holiday, time for family, “Summer time is here!” Perhaps some Americans do reflect on the true meaning of this day—America’s independence from their mother country, 230 years ago.

Every American treasures and values their own independence. American parents raise their children with the hopes that one day they will be independent—their children will be able to make their own decisions and live freely as they choose. Isn’t this every American’s dream? And to have a sense of independence in one’s life is an essential need—that vital and quintessential value that Americans hold from the day they are born till the day they die.

Let us reflect now on this American value and the truth of the matter. Did you know that today, America owns territorial possessions around the world? A “possession” means that America has taken ownership of lands, where it was not initially her own, and use these lands for her own benefit. In this modern day, these possessions are called “colonies.” Americans did not ask nicely for these lands and its people; but used force to obtain these lands—disenfranchising and marginalizing many indigenous along the way. America has drafted up documents without their consent stating that Congress, the Senate, and the Executive Office “has the power to dispose of, and make all needful rules and regulations” on the individuals who live in these lands. These documents also state that these “owned” individuals are not even subject to the rights inherent in the U.S. Constitution—“Life, Liberty, and the Pursuit of Happiness!” Where is the “independence” so coveted by Americans when they own and possess other people and their lands and do not provide them the very essential human liberties which should be afforded any living creature?!

As a U.S. citizen, I refuse to partake in a celebration of “independence” when the truth of the matter is that America has willfully taken away another’s independence so that they can reap the benefits. The irony in this is that America knowingly abuses others in the very same way they have been abused.

Think critically as you enter into a celebration of America’s independence from colonial status and remember that YOU, as Americans, continue to own colonies today! Indigenous people today suffer in their lives and livelihoods because of their colonial status. They do not deserve the hardships they face because of their lack of independence, just as America did not! I call on Americans to educate themselves and others on these matters! Allow the people of American colonies to live the life of liberty and freedom that you yourselves find so priceless!

An Apology from Life's Cliffs

A very personal post today, so I hope you'll forgive me.

I’m at the very end of a big phase of my life. I’m all but finished with my Ph.D. program, I graduated, I defended

As I stand here though, where the future looks like a frightening bleak expanse, which I can only jump into, and the past is a welcoming mass of things all radiating nostalgia, both in good and bad sense. First as things which I no longer cherish, but wish I could and others which I have left behind and wish I didn’t. Whenever we come to a point such as this, we wish desperately that we could sift through that old life, like a family searching through an already burning house for the things that are most precious, and pack a suitcase to carry them with us.

But you know that you can’t do that. Some if not most of that old life will be waiting for you at the bottom of the cliff. It will appear brand new at first, but then begin to signify the same familiarity. What scares us the most about this situation, this transition, this literally life-changing jump, is not that we can’t control it in the sense of deciding what we take with us and what we leave behind. But its all about finding a way to live with, or to continue to go on, despite certain choices that you have made, which prevent you from taking something with you into the future. It is not that the rules of the universe scare you and prohibit you from mastering this transition, but what you have done to ensure that you will never actually feel complete once you take that jump, you will always pine for or be haunted by something you made a conscious decision to leave behind or betray in your path.

As I ponder this point in my own life, my mind is constantly drawn to the figure who meant the most to me during this time. Other than my daughter Sumåhi, she was the most cherished and loved piece of me in recent years. For anyone, love is always a charged and strange thing, but for me I don’t generally have any pretense that it is a simple thing. When I say loved, I mean she was someone I put my trust in, someone I made myself consciously dependent upon, someone who I, against all my selfish or self-protective instincts, would make myself vulnerable to, would allow to see parts of me that I don’t show to anyone. Let her have a power over my that I wouldn’t want anyone else to have.

This is why love can be so hard though. There is no Hallmark card that lays out what love will be between people, it is always an issue of context and dynamics, and the intriguing part about it is that people always change roles and end up deflecting and shaping their loves and demands off of each other.

One of the main ways in which I made myself vulnerable, the ways in which I felt love and made my love known was through the sharing of my academic work and accepting of criticism and editing of it from this person. I know that probably sounds like the least romantic thing in the world, but romance like love is all about context, and so within this context, this was the deepest and most private thing that I could share, and this was the most sacred way in which I gave her trust. I hate letting other people read my writing with an expectation that they can criticize it or suggest improvements to it. I hate letting other people edit my work, but with this person things were different. Although I would still resist her comments and resist her power over me, it was still a bond we shared and one I was happy to share with her. I don’t say this with any exaggeration that she was my rock in graduate school, and I literally could not have done it without her.

The complexities of life, and some of my choices, my stupid, and sometimes my desperate choices made it so that we could no longer be together. As I prepare to take the jump into the next phase of my life, I find myself constantly looking back for her, instinctively reaching out for her, desperately hoping that there was something I could do or so, to make up for the hurt I had caused, purchase some sort of insurance that would ensure that she could be down at the bottom of the cliff below waiting for me.

When a relationship changes drastically, and when the love of one changes, it is almost worse than simply breaking up. If the other partner can be an evil thing, a horrid, wretched thing, which hates me now, which can never spare me another smile, except to ridicule or mock me, than all the love I once felt, can quickly make the transition into hatred and facilitate the moving on process. It may not feel good regardless, but it can allow that person feelings of anger and action, it can keep them from feeling like they are a hopeless, useless victim. If it is not a matter of love being extinguished, but rather just changing, things are so much harder. There may be anger and hurt, and so moving on is harder, because things always feel like they could still just be the same.

I don’t know where I am going next in my life. People tell me things, and there’s places I need to go and things I need to do. But I feel horribly incomplete now as I leave this person behind. Although I’ve only talked about academic dependency here, she was so much more to me, and although I never talk about it, everyday I struggle with how to go on without her comforting voice, with her advice, without her presence as a rock, a source of sanity in my life.

Este na tinige'-hu i tiniestigu-hu para Hami yan i guinaiyan-mami. Despensa yu', asi'i' yu'.

*********************************
"Little Star"
Eloise
Semantics

I bought a phone card
I pay good money to argue with you
When speaking to you is like reaching for the stars
And talking is like is reaching for the moon
And maybe I'll argue my way to mars
Get a little bit closer, to you
A little bit closer

How the hell, how the hell
Do you do what you do to me?
Distance is terrible
I can feel you growing apart
I might as well be a zillion miles away
And you might be my little star
And maybe I'll never reach you anyway

Two Stories of (Military) Censorship

The first story deals with the Joint Guam Program Office (JGPO) which is the group in charge of organizing and publicizing the transfer of Marines from Okinawa to Guam over the next few years. This story came out several months ago, and dealt with JGPO allegedly cutting off all media access to the Marianas Variety (most prominently to the Guam Industry Forum III). The stated reasons was due to repeated inaccuracies in their reporting and taking press releases and other documents from JGPO and publishing them out of context. The Marianas Variety made a big deal (as they should) about being "banned" from access to the event and possibly to military information about Guam, although by the next day everything seemed to be in order again and the ban or censorship issue was quietly dropped by just about everyone.

A JGPO or a military ban on the Marianas Variety is to be expected. Whereas the Variety's main competition on Guam The Pacific Daily News considers itself to be a "real" newspaper, with stateside corporate and editorial connections, and a long illustrious history of feeding the people of Guam lessons in Americanization and citizenship, the Variety seems to be machalapon to put it nicely. The Pacific Daily News has a very clear ideological filter. It is anti-government of Guam, it is pro-business, it is anti-Chamorro activist and pro-military. It will deal with Chamorro issues so long as their is a profit angle, some business sense to it, but it stays away from dealing with Chamorro issues in any political sense. The adherence to this clear ideological lens becomes a key part of the sophistication of the PDN. That it knows what is and isn't news, that it can set an agenda for Guam, that it knows what Guam really needs and has no problems with putting it out there.

The lens provides a sleek and easy way of determining all of these things. Activists protesting or criticizing, that's old news, they haven't had anything new to say in more than ten years, its all just noise, no agenda, no ideas, just complaining. On the other hand, a businessman saying that the military buildup is good for Guam, is treated as if we have just looked into the face of God and he has smiled back gently at us and told us quoting some comforting Bob Marley lyrics that everything is going to be fine and good. The word which best describes the PDN from this perspective is clarity. The world is clear and simple ideologically. The island may be in serious trouble todu i tiempo, all the time, but we are always told through the news stories covered, what is important, and can divide that importance into the camps of who is at fault for ruining the island, and who are those we can rely on to fix it. Hayi manggaihinasso yan hayi mantaihinasso? Hayi mama'titinas adilanto yan hayi umi'isao? Hayi fina'maolek yan hayi atkagueti?

The Variety on the other hand is a portrait of ideological inconsistency and lack of clarity. The Marianas Variety publishes far more stories which are critical of the military, the Federal Government, and also covers Chamorro political struggles, but it doesn't do this out of some ideological lens that states that activists are good, military is bad. The Marianas Variety is a newspaper which constantly responds to whoever is talking to it and whatever stories are out there. This can mean however, that "stories" that it writes are simply press releases from organizations or people. It can mean that a story only takes one side of an issue. But ultimately is means that the world of Guam in the Marianas Variety is as complex as the world actually is. You can see the newspaper pro-business one day, anti-business the next. Apparently liberal one day, stark-raving mad conservative the next. Pro-Chamorro, anti-Chamorro. Anti-Gov Guam and then anti-Federales. If you ever want to see this in action, check out their editorial pages. Those things are literally insane in a borderline schizophrenic sense. Editorials from The New York Times, Townhall.com, arch conservatives, daily letters to the editor from Matt Phillips and Felix Aguon, columns by Guam Senators, a column by Dave Davis, columns by two Variety reporters. There is no pretense of a liberal or a conservative side, and there is no mirroring of the PDNs strategy of simply asserting that whatever we put here is the right side, its just a mess of different opinions.

The military and JGPO would be right being suspicious of the Marianas Variety, since they don't possess the sophistication of the PDN and therefore constantly let through opinions and stories that they "shouldn't." They sometimes reflect mindsets which are more critical of the military or the United States, and those are precisely the things in a colony such as Guam today which need to be forgotten, edited out or neutralized.

So that temporary ban is to be expected, the second however is much less so. The second one comes from CNN and covers the fact that the military paper Stars and Stripes is accusing the Department of Defense of censorship in Afghanistan and Iraq!

*****************

Variety Banned by JGPO
Wednesday, 29 April 2009
by Jennifer Naylor Gesick
Marianas Variety News

THE Joint Guam Project Office yesterday barred the entry of the Marianas Variety staff to all three venues hosting the Guam Industry Forum III. Two Variety reporters and a staff photographer were told by officials at the check-in tables at the Sheraton, Hilton and Marriot hotels that the Variety has been “banned” from attending the event.

Onsite industry forum personnel notified the reporting staff that the ban was on a “federal level” and was issued as a “government order” from U.S. Marine Corp Capt. Neil Ruggiero with the Joint Guam Project Office. JGPO is the liaison between Guam and the military regarding the military buildup.

The ban was in effect in all venues, as confirmed by Variety reporters in the field. Press passes were printed for every media company on island, except for the Variety.

When reached for comment yesterday afternoon, Ruggiero refused to call the restriction a “ban,” and claimed that the forum personnel were subcontracted and were not speaking directly for JGPO.

Registration fee
Ruggiero argued that Variety could have attended the event as a business if the publishers had registered with the forum.

“Marianas Variety was given the same opportunity as anyone else, they just chose not to be paying registrants, [Pacific Daily News] chose to pay and they were allowed access,” he said.

“I had to pay to work, everybody has to pay to be there,” Ruggiero added.

However, any media covering the event was allowed in free.

In response to claims of a violation of the freedom of the press in restricting access to the forum, Ruggiero responded that “the press who only stays one session is allowed in free.” That accommodation was not extended to the Variety.

Ruggiero also said that a Variety columnist was given access to represent the paper.

Variety columnist Jayne Flores confirmed that she was given a pass, but Ruggiero later said, “I told her she could not come as Marianas Variety or write any news for them.”

Firing range
The “ban” stemmed from a story titled “DoD’s plan to build off-base ranges confirmed,” published in the Jan. 15 issue of the Variety, in which the JGPO was reported to have confirmed speculations on the Department of Defense’s plan to build firing ranges on Route 15 in Yigo, commonly known as “the back road to Andersen.”

“These are small arms ranges that are not new to Guam; rifle and pistol ranges as well as machine gun ranges that are direct fire weapons and primarily used for the annual qualifications of Marines,” the Variety quoted a written article submitted by Ruggiero on behalf of the author Lt. Col. Rudy Kube, JGPO’s operations director.

Prior to publication of the story, the Variety editor informed Ruggiero that Kube’s piece would be rewritten as a staff-story. He did not object to the request, but protested when the article was published.

Ruggiero has since informed the paper’s staff that Variety would no longer have any access to any JGPO officials.

Out of context
“Your paper took an editorial out of context. In doing so your readers did not get the full story,” Ruggiero said. “We chose to no longer deal with your paper.”

Ruggiero denied sending a response to the editors, which is commonly done to properly address such issues. “No, I did not write a rebuttal letter. I wanted Amier [Younis] (Variety operations manager) to reprint the original letter as a whole,” he said.

Ruggiero could not grant Variety’s request for access as of press time. “I will have to talk to my boss about that.”

Expressing her opinion on the media ban, Sen. Judy Guthertz, in a letter promptly written yesterday to JGPO director Maj. Gen. David Bice, USMC (Ret.), stressed the importance of granting all media companies equal treatment.

She wrote, “I am writing to express my disappointment that representatives of the federal government have reportedly prohibited a member of Guam’s media, specifically the Marianas Variety, from covering the Guam Industry Forum.

“I understand that JGPO may have a problem or problems with the content of one or more of the Variety’s news stories or editorials. Whatever the case may be, I urge you to strive to work out those problems with the editors and publisher, and not prevent members of the media to cover an important part of what will likely be our island’s more important story this year,” she told Bice.

The letter concluded: “Multiple media voices can be of great value to a community, especially one as small as Guam, where coverage from different sources can often help to provide a variety of points of view.”

*********************

Stars and Stripes accuses U.S. military of censorship in Iraq
June 24, 2009

WASHINGTON (CNN) -- Stars and Stripes, the newspaper that receives U.S. military funding to help it cover and get distributed free to American forces in war zones, complained Tuesday of censorship by military authorities in Iraq.

In a story on its Web site, the newspaper known as Stripes said the military violated a congressional mandate of editorial independence by rejecting a request to embed reporter Heath Druzin with the U.S. Army's 1st Cavalry Division, which is attempting to secure the city of Mosul.

The military cited various problems in Druzin's reporting on previous embed assignments with units of the division, according to the story.

One example noted by the military was a March 8 story that said many Mosul residents would like the American soldiers to leave and hand over security tasks to Iraqi forces, the Stripes Web site said.

"Despite the opportunity to visit areas of the city where Iraqi Army leaders, soldiers, national police and Iraqi police displayed commitment to partnership, Mr. Druzin refused to highlight any of this news," Maj. Ramona Bellard, a public affairs officer, wrote in denying Druzin's embed request, according to the Stripes story.

A military official in Iraq defended the move to turn down the reporter's request.

"U.S. Army units in Iraq remain committed to the media embed program and appreciate objective media reporting," said Lt. Col. David H. Patterson Jr., a spokesman for Multi-National Corps-Iraq. "The relationship that Druzin established with the command during a previous embed did not facilitate being invited back."

Patterson added that Druzin was welcome to embed in another unit and that the 1st Cavalry Division was open to having a reporter other than Druzin.

"Accusations of censorship are without merit," Patterson said.

Other allegations against Druzin by the military included that he used quotes out of context, behaved unprofessionally and persisted in asking Army officials for permission to use a computer to file a story during a communications blackout period, the Stripes story said.

Terry Leonard, editorial director at Stars and Stripes, denied the Army's allegations, calling Druzin's previous reporting on the division accurate and fair.

"To simply say 'you can't send him because we didn't like what he wrote' is unacceptable," Leonard said. He noted that Congress set up Stripes as an independent newspaper so that "no commander can decide what news troops in the field receive."

Army officials have offered to allow a different Stripes reporter to embed with the division or to allow Druzin to embed with a different Army unit in Kirkuk, Leonard said.

Stripes rejected those offers because the military has no right to deflect coverage from Mosul or decide which Stripes reporter covers its operations, Leonard said.

"To deny Mr. Druzin an embed under the reasons stated by Maj. Bellard is a direct challenge to the editorial independence of this newspaper," Leonard wrote in his appeal to the decision, according to the Stripes story. "That independence is mandated by Congress. The denial of the embed constitutes an attempt at censorship and it is also an illegal prior restraint under federal law. ... The military cannot tell us what stories to write or not write."

Stripes receives close to $10 million a year from the Department of Defense to help defray the costs of covering "contingency" operations in Iraq and Afghanistan, including the publishing and distribution of roughly 85,000 free newspapers a day, Leonard said.

The newspaper receives additional government subsidies, with the total amounting to less than half of its budget, he said. Other revenue comes from ad sales and circulation at permanent U.S. military bases and elsewhere, Leonard said.

CNN has been denied embed requests on occasion but never because of the past conduct of individual journalists. The reasons have almost always involved logistical details involving security and force coverage.

Pieces of a Map of Violence

As part of my "detour of Hawai'i," earlier today I had the chance to speak to a group of Waianae High School students who are participating in a summer environmental justice program sponsored by the American Friends Service Committee. As part of this program, they are traveling all around Oahu, looking at different sites of development, militarization and what sort of historical and contemporary problems that these sites have or are causing. They are also visiting sites where people whether through reclamation, reforestation, the propagation of native plant species or the practicing of sustainable agricultural programs, are also working towards solutions in making the island a more sustainable and more naturally balanced place.

Even before meeting the students, I was already excited, because of what sorts of potential lessons I could learn from the program itself, and how something similar could be organized for Guam youth.

I was asked to speak to them to discuss the environmental challenges that Guam is facing today, especially with regards to the military presence there and the military buildups that are looming on the horizon. I decided to frame my short talk through the metaphor of "maps." Sasha Davis, a former professor at the University of Vermont, who conducted research on Guam several years back, and according to rumor is a sometimes reader of this blog, was brought in to work with the students in developing community maps as their final projects. The same day that I spoke, a Tongan orator and scholar Emil Wolfgram had spoken to the students about the landscape of Oahu, and seeing the hidden clues, or the trace elements of older ways in which the island was mapped. The stories that gave the landscape meaning, that gave it a Pacific and a Hawaiian cartography, and one which is always constantly in the process of being paved over, bulldozed to make way for military training exercises or being commodified to enhance the tourist exotic flavor of the island.

With this sort of thinking already in the students' minds, I decided to talk to them about another way of considering maps of Hawai'i or Oahu.

The military is always obsessed about maps, it produces so many of them, it can eventually cause problems, because if shows the nature of their thinking, their crass desires, their cravings for property for conquest. It can always argue that their maps are "pre-decisional" or just exploratory, but the plethora of maps that the military is always using or creating nonetheless show the complex way in which they seek to not just dominate of control parts of the world they inhabit, but also a desire to control the representation of that world. To find a way to capture it in easily consumed and digested details, figures and shapes, lines and scales on a map.

In heavily militarized places like Guam or Oahu, the military is one of the key figures in determining the representing of land. They control vast pieces of land on these islands, and the maps that they use, that they imagine are often the ones which have the most power. And this map is given power or strength, it feels natural or it feels right based on the value that the military pumps into it, the arguments they make, not just about what is or isn't theirs, but what their presence does. What its relationship is to the land, to people, to security, to economy. The military and its view of the world is so dominant, because people outside of the fences or outside of the service tend to accept the things that military says about itself in the world, they tend to accept (to continue the metaphor) the key to their map.

On Guam we all know this key by heart, and if you ever forget it, you need only scan through a random issue of the Pacific Daily News or simply talk to someone in your family to be reminded. In other posts I refer to these ideas as colonizing fictions, and part of the mythology that props up American power and greatness in Guam. More military means more money, more jobs, a better economy. The military is a great steward of the environment. More military means more safety and security.

If you believe these fictions, if you accept them, then the map that the military proposes isn't just a good one, but starts to feel like a necessary one, as if everything would crumble and turn to dust unless we are all defined by their interests. The map of the military seeks to push out or erase all others. In the case of Oahu, on the military map of the island, you'll see no meaningful place for concepts such as Native Hawaiian sovereignty, ceded lands, the 1893 overthrow. These are all crucial things which have been essential in making the heavily militarized Hawai'i of today, primarily through their being forgotten or pretended to not mean anything except as noise from crazy brown people.

I didn't go into this much detail in my talk, but after making this point, I reminded the students there that through this program, by visiting all of these sites of military contamination and expansion, they were being given pieces of Oahu's most important map, the map which the military works so hard to keep hidden, or pretend doesn't exist. They were gathering together pieces of the map of the violence against the land of Oahu, the way it has been damaged by the heavy military presence, the way it will continue to be damaged.

I told them all that they held a great responsibility by being given this chance to see their island from a completely different perspective. They were being handed the truths to the colonizing fictions and it was up to them to assert the map of violence that they were learning about. More military can wreck an economy and polarize it, drive up the cost of living, making housing less affordable for those not in the military. The military works very hard to appear to be an environmental steward, while generally creating some of the worst toxic and hazardous waste sites you can imagine. The military creates a facade of nicely cut lawns and nicely painted houses, while the reality of military bases are savage environmental damage and high disease rates that often effect even the civilian communities outside of the gates and fences.

The students appeared to be interested and paying attention, and so I was very glad I got to speak to them. I hope to hear more about their projects and I really hope to establish a similar sort of program on Guam, as its such an important way of mentoring and preparing the next generation of activists.

When the students were asked if they had any questions after I was finished, there was only one. A female student asked how she would say "I Love You" or "What's Your Number?" in Chamorro. After the whole class laughed, I referred to my "I Love You in Chamorro" page on this blog.